The Lively Shadow: Living with the Death of a ChildBallantine Books, 2003 - 193 pages "Remembering may be a celebration or it may be a dagger in the heart, but it is better, far better, than forgetting."--Donald M. Murray It is the hardest thing anyone can face--the death of a child. A tragedy that has affected millions also touched Donald M. Murray, Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist for The Boston Globe, twenty-five years ago. Now, for the first time, he fully expresses what he lost--and learned--in a book even more moving than his inspiring volume on aging, My Twice-Lived Life. Lee Murray was Donald and Minnie Mae's middle child, one of three girls. An avid oboe player accepted by a prestigious conservatory, the family "caretaker" with compassion for everyone, a young woman with a devoted boyfriend and the whole world ahead of her--Lee succumbed at age twenty to Reye's Syndrome, commonly considered a childhood illness. In The Lively Shadow, her father remembers the hell of her passing and the healing it took him years to finally experience. From hearing the initial news that Lee was in the hospital and the four harrowing days spent by her bedside, to trying to teach, write, and love others while grieving, to learning to live at last with only Lee's memory, Donald Murray embarks upon a journey that is at once universal and informed by his own life's details. Whether he's feeling irrational guilt at not being able to protect his child or pulling off the highway to release a primal howl, the pain Murray feels brings him finally to a place of peace, an acceptance whereby he realizes "the most terrible experience in my life has also been a gift," requiring "a continuous celebration of the commonplace." Unflinching in its honesty, The Lively Shadow is a beloved author's most impressive achievement--a book bound to be of continuing comfort to anyone who has lost a loved one, a touchstone on a topic few have written about, let alone addressed so openly. |
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Page 69
... stiff upper lip and , worst of all , our leaving her alone , not touching her , not holding her hand , not talk- ing to her . Years after , I will know that she might have heard us , might not have spent her last days so terribly alone ...
... stiff upper lip and , worst of all , our leaving her alone , not touching her , not holding her hand , not talk- ing to her . Years after , I will know that she might have heard us , might not have spent her last days so terribly alone ...
Page 78
... stiff- upper - lip tradition . It is weakness to cry , strength to show as little emotion as possible . We screw our feelings down tight . And we do not want to get in the way of the doc- tors , nurses , and technicians who are fighting ...
... stiff- upper - lip tradition . It is weakness to cry , strength to show as little emotion as possible . We screw our feelings down tight . And we do not want to get in the way of the doc- tors , nurses , and technicians who are fighting ...
Page 112
... stiff upper lip . I al- low tears to flow if they come , I laugh if it is appropriate , trying to show that such a loss can be survived . I accept the obligation of role model , one who can strip away some of the mystery about death in ...
... stiff upper lip . I al- low tears to flow if they come , I laugh if it is appropriate , trying to show that such a loss can be survived . I accept the obligation of role model , one who can strip away some of the mystery about death in ...
Table des matières
The Gift | 1 |
Innocence | 7 |
Conception | 9 |
Droits d'auteur | |
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Expressions et termes fréquents
accept alive ambulance Anne and Hannah asked baby become Boston Boston Symphony Orchestra brain celebrate cemetery Chevy Suburban child childhood close combat comfort conservatory corridor daugh daughter dead doctors Don Graves door dream driving dying emptiness escape face father fear feel felt friends gift of death girls grade guilt Hampshire happened hear high school hope knew later laughing learned Learning by Teaching Lee Murray Lee's death live look Lumpectomy Massachusetts General Hospital memory Minnie Mae morning moved neighbors never night nurses oboe parents pass Paul Paul Lambert play rage realize remember Reye's syndrome sick silence slow smile stand stiff upper lip stop story street submarine sandwich survive talk teacher teaching tell thought tion told took tree turn Vermont waiting room wake walk weeks woman writing young