Colladan.-It is treating us like a pack of fools.
Benjamin (to Chambourcy).-Sir, your friend said

Chambourcy. Don't bother me. (Altering his tone, to Benjamin.) Here! to put an end to it, will you take a hundred francs ?

(Aside to the rest of

He will

Benjamin.-It is not my business. Chambourcy. All right! as you like. the party.) Let us appear to be going away. give in. (They all take hats, bonnets, travelling bags, and bundles; Chambourcy his umbrella, Colladan his pickaxe.)

Second Waiter (enters, followed by a policeman).-There they are. . . . They refuse to pay.

Chambourcy. That is to say that we refuse to be fleeced.

Leonida.-Melon at ten francs a slice. ... Colladan.-There are twelve slices. hundred and twenty francs the melon.

That makes one

The Policeman.-Let me see the bill-of-fare. hands it to him.)

(Benjamin

Chambourcy.-Why, their bill-of-fare is Hounslow Heath in the highway robbery days. They hide the noughts. It is a downright shame. (In gesticulating he waves his umbrella, out of which there falls a watch.) Hallo! what's that? All.-A watch!

The Policeman (Picking it up).-Who does that watch belong to ?

Chambourcy.-It is not mine. .
All.-Nor mine.

The Policeman (examining it, aside to himself).-The chain is broken . . . this watch has been stolen. (Aloud.) How did this watch get into your umbrella?

Chambourcy. I can't tell at all.

...

Benjamin (aside to the policeman).-Search them... they have other things in their pockets. (He steps back.)

The Policeman.-Ah! (aside) that watch-a refusal to pay. (Aloud.) Come, follow me; you shall account for all at the

station.

Colladan.-Station! what station?

The Policeman.-At the police station.

The amusing scene in the police station can be read in the play of La Cagnotte.

40. SCENE DE LA MASCOTTE.

Rocco propriétaire italien que ne réussit pas, et se plaint de son guignon.

Rocco (vivement à Pippo qui entre).-Eh bien, tu as vu Antonio?

Pippo.-Oui..

il se porte bien

Pippo.-Je lui ai remis votre lettre

Rocco. Qu'est-ce qu'il a fait ?

Pippo. Il l'a décachetée et il l'a lue . .

Rocco. Je m'en doute . . . mais après, après qu'est-ce qu'il a dit?

Pippo. Il a dit comme ça! (Imitant Antonio), Oh c'pauvre frère !

Rocco.-Voilà tout?

...

Pippo. Attendez donc (Reprenant.) Oh! c'pauvre frère. cette fois ce n'est pas en vain qu'il se sera addressé à moi.

...

Rocco (et tous les assistants).—Ah! Pippo.-Je veux me dépouiller pour lui . . . Je veux lui faire un cadeau royal . . . Va-t'en bien vite et dis-lui que je vais lui envoyer Bettina!

Tous.-Bettina! . .

Rocco. Qu'est-ce que c'est que ça, Bettina ?

Pippo.-Vous ne connaissez pas Bettina? . . . Bettina-larougeaude? une grosse fille, la gardeuse de dindons . . .

Rocco. Comment! il m'envoie sa gardeuse de dindons ! Voilà le cadeau . . . royal, qu'il me fait! . . . Il faut vraiment que mon frère soit fou Il augmente mes charges

.

quand il sait que je manque de tout

Pippo.-Ah! ça c'est bien vrai .. nous manquons de tout... Je n'ai même pas de bretelles

Rocco. Quand il sait que ce satané guignon ne me lâche pas d'une semelle.

. pas d'une semelle . . .

Pippo.-Oh! ça c'est bien vrai Ce guignon là c'est comme de la glu... Savez-vous ce

40. THE MASCOTTE.

Rocco, an Italian gentleman farmer, unlucky in his undertakings. Enter Pippo.

Rocco (earnestly).-Well, did you see Antonio?

Pippo.-I gave him your letter
Rocco.-Well, what did he do?

Pippo. He unsealed it and read it

Rocco.-I suppose he did... but after that; what did he

say?

Pippo. He said, in this sort of way (imitating Antonio), Oh, dear! poor brother!

Rocco. Is that all?

Pippo.-Wait a bit .

(beginning again). Oh, poor

brother... this time he won't have applied to me in

vain.

Rocco (to all around). Ah!

Pippo. I will deprive myself for him I will make him a princely gift... Go, go back quickly to him, and tell him that I am going to send him Bettina !

All.-Bettina !

Rocco. What's Bettina ?

Pippo.-Don't you know Bettina? ... Bettina, the carrotty girl? a great strong wench who minds his geese.

Rocco. What, he sends me his goose girl! That's the princely gift he makes me! ... Oh, my brother must be mad He just increases my burdens when he knows that I am short of everything

Pippo.-Ah, that's too true

thing

we are in want of every

I have not even got a pair of braces. Rocco. When he knows that my bad luck never gives me an inch of rope.

Pippo.-Oh! well that is true

not an inch . . .

That bad luck sticks to us like birdlime here

qu'il vous faudrait, patron? . . . Eh bien, je vas vous le dire moi.. il vous faudrait une mascotte.

Tous.- Une mascotte?

Rocco. Qu'est-ce que tu nous chantes là !

Pippo.-Comment, vous ignorez ce que c'est qu'une

Pippo.-Ah! bah! . Savez-vous ce que c'est qu'un jettator?

Tous. -Oh! ça, nous le savons.

Pippo. Un jettator, n'est-ce pas, c'est celui qui a le mauvais œil . . . celui qui vous porte malheur . . . Eh bien, une mascotte, c'est tout le contraire.

you know what it is you want, master? Well, I will tell you What you want is a Mascotte.

then

is?

All.-A Mascotte?

Rocco. What are you talking about?

Pippo.-Why don't you know what a Mascotte is?

All.-No, we don't.

Pippo.-No, really Why you know what a gettatore

...

All.-Oh, that! we all know that.

Pippo. A gettatore is one who has the evil eye .. he casts a spell which brings you ill luck . . . Well, a Mascotte is the opposite to that.

One day proud Satan chose from his boiling cauldron a pack of evil-eyed demons and despatched them forth in the world. But our protecting providence, to counteract their influence, created certain propitious angels, and sent them to our relief. These heaven-sent emissaries are called Mascottes, friends, and happy is the man by heaven favoured with a Mascotte.

No sooner does one of these helps appear in his house than a run of luck sets therein. The sick man recovers, the pauper makes a fortune, and the henpecked husband loses his

tormentor.