A SERENADE.

SMILE, lady, smile! (Bless me! what's that?

Confound the cat!)—

Smile, lady, smile! One glance bestow

PUNCH.

On him who sadly waits below,

To catch-(A villain up above

Has thrown some water on me, love !)
To catch one token-

(Oh, Lord! my head is broken;

The wretch who threw the water down,
Has dropped the jug upon my crown)—
To catch one token, which shall be
As dear as life itself to me.

List, lady, then; while on my lute
I breathe soft-(No! I'll not be quiet;
How dare you call my serenade a riot?
I do defy you)-while upon my lute
I breathe soft sighs—(Yes, I dispute
Your right to stop me-breathe soft sighs.
Grant but one look from those dear eyes-
(There, take that stupid noddle in again;
Call the police!-do! I'll prolong my strain),
We'll wander by the river's placid flow-
(Unto the station-house !—No, sir, I won't go;
Leave me alone!)-and talk of love's delight.

(Oh, murder !—help! I'm locked up for the night!)

RAILROAD NURSERY RHYME.

PUNCH.

Am" Ride a Cock Horse."

FLY by steam force the country across,
Faster than jockey outside a race-horse:

With time bills mismanaged, fast trains after slow,
You shall have danger wherever you go.

AN INVITATION TO THE ZOOLOGICAL GARDENS.

PUNCH.

I HAVE found out a gig-gig-gift for my fuf-fuf-fair,
I have found where the rattle-snakes bub-bub-breed;

Will you co-co-come, and I'll show you the bub-bub-bear,
And the lions and tit-tit-tigers at fuf-fuf-feed.

I know where the co-co-cockatoo's song

Makes mum-mum-melody through the sweet vale; Where the mum-monkeys gig-gig-grin all the day long. Or gracefully swing by the tit-tit-tit-tail.

You shall pip-pip-play, dear, some did-did-delicate joke With the bub-bub-bear on the tit-tit-top of his pip-pip-pippole;

But observe, 'tis forbidden to pip-pip-poke

At the bub-bub-bear with your pip-pip-pink pip-pip-pip-pipparasol!

You shall see the huge elephant pip-pip-play,

You shall gig-gig-gaze on the stit-stit-stately racoon; And then did-did-dear, together we'll stray

To the cage of the bub-bub-blue-faced bab-bab-boon.

You wished (I r-r-remember it well,

And I lul-lul-loved you the m-m-more for the wish) To witness the bub-bub-beautiful pip-pip-pelican swallow the 1-1-ive little fuf-fuf-fish!

ΤΟ ΘΕ ΛΕΑΔΙΝΓ ΠΕΡΙΟΔΙΚΑΛ

Θις κομπλιμέντ, γρεατ σιρ, ο τακε,
Υρε α βρικ ανδ να μιστάκε,

Ενεμι το καντ ανδ φυγε.
Τιμε το θεε 1 νε ερ βεγρυδγε,
Ανδ Ι ώπε το σεε υρε ναμε
Φωρεμοστ ιν θε λιστς οφ Φαμε.

PUNCH

Τομ Σμιθ, Γρυβ στρεετ.

* English words in Greek letters.

THE PEOPLE AND THEIR PALACE.

IMPROVISED BY A FINE GENTLEMAN.

Оn dem that absawd Cwystal Palace! alas,
What a pity they took off the duty on glass!
It's having been evaw ewected, in fact,
Was en-ti-a-ly owing to that foolish act.

Wha-evew they put it a cwowd it will dwaw,
And that is the weason I think it a baw;
I have no gweat dislike to the building, as sutch;
The People is what I object to sa mutch.

The People!-I weally am sick of the wawd:
The People is ugly, unpleasant, absawd;
Wha-evaw they go, it is always the case,

PUNCH.

They are shaw to destroy all the chawm of the place.

Their voices are loud, and their laughter is hawse;
Their featyaws are fabsy, iwegulaw, cause;
How seldom it is that their faces disclose,

What one can call, pwopally speaking, a nose!

They have dull heavy looks, which appeaw to expwess
Disagweeable stwuggles with common distwess;
The People can't dwess, does n't know how to walk,
And would uttaly wuin a spot like the Pawk.

That I hate the People is maw than I'll say;

I only would have them kept out of my way,
Let them stay at the pot-house, wejoice in the pipe,
And wegale upon beeaw, baked patatas, and twipe.

We must have the People-of that tha 's no doubt-
In shawt they could not be, pahaps, done without.
If 'twa not faw the People we could not have Boots.
Tha 's no doubt that they exawcise useful pasuits.

They are all vewy well in their own pwopa spheeaw,
A long distance off; but I don't like them neeaw;

The slams is the place faw a popula show;
Don't encouwage the people to spoil Wotten Wow.

It is odd that the DUKE OF AWGYLL could pasne,
So eccentwic a cawse, and LAD SHAFTESBUWY too,
As to twy and pwesawve the Glass House on its site,
Faw no weason on awth but the People's delight.

A "SWELL'S" HOMAGE TO MRS. STOWE.

A MUST Wead Uncle Tom-a wawk

Which A'm afwaid's extwemely slow,
People one meets begin to talk

Of Mrs. HARWIETBEECHASTOWE.

'Tis not as if A saw ha name

To walls and windas still confined;

All that is meawly vulga fame:

A don't wespect the public mind.

But Staffa'd House has made haw quite
Anotha kind a pawson look,

A Countess would pasist, last night,
In asking me about haw book.

She wished to know if I admiawd

EVA, which quite confounded me;
And then haw Ladyship inqwaw'd
Whethaw A did 'nt hate LEGWEE?

Bai JOVE! A was completely flaw'd;
A wish'd myself, or haw, at Fwance;
And that's the way a fella 's baw'd
By ev'wy gal he asks to dance.

A felt myself a gweat a fool

Than A had evaw felt befaw;
A 'll study at some Wagged School
The tale of that old Blackamaw!

PUNCH.

THE EXCLUSIVE'S BROKEN IDOL.

A DON'T object at all to War

With a set a fellas like the Fwench,
But this dem wupcha with the Czar,
It gives one's feeling quite a wench.

The man that peace in Yawwup kept
Gives all his pwevious life the lie;
A fina fella neva stepped,

Bai Jove, he 's maw than six feet high!

He cwushed those democwatic beasts;
He'd flog a Nun; maltweat a Jew,
Or pawsecute those Womish Pwiests,
Most likely vewy pwoppa too.

To think that afta such a cawce,
Which nobody could eva blame,
The EMP'WA should employ bwute fawce
Against this countwy just the same!

We all consida'd him our fwiend,
But in a most erwoneus light,
In shawt, it seems you can't depend
On one who fancies might is wight.

His carwacta is coming out;

His motives-which A neva saw

Are now wevealed beyond a doubt,

And we must fight—but what a baw !

PUNCH.

THE LAST KICK OF FOP'S ALLEY.

AIR-Weber's Last Waltz."

My wawst feaws are wealized; the Op'wa is na maw,
And the wain of DONIZETTI and TAPISCHOWE are aw!
No entapwising capitalist bidding faw the lot,
In detail at last the pwopaty is being sold by SCOTT.

PUNCH.